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Sickly Red Dreams
08 May 2003 @ 11:13 p.m.
Headache. This is all I am able to concentrate on, all I can think about. My head hurts. As does my throat. I'm all stuffy and snuffly.
Silly me to ignore the scratchy sore throat yesterday morning. Because now I am full out sick-like. I'm sure the excessive drinking last night didn't help either.
I let myself sleep in this morning to recover from last night's events. Went out for one last hurrah with the Beautiful People and T. Except as soon as I started to have a good time down at the Dog, I was dragged away to another bar. I shouldn't have let them drag me away. The only good part about the second bar was that we were able to get Cheese Curds. Went back to the Dog later on with only one other person, ran into some co-workers from the theatre, but it just wasn't what I was looking for.
It hit me, as I sat in the big picture window, listening to Billy Joel stream from the jukebox, watching the bartenders serve up pitchers of Labatts, that this is the end of my second wind. The end of the first wind came when numnum transfered to another school and J moved downstate and everyone else from our bar crowd left. That hit me incredibly hard because it was the support group leaving. Now here I am coming to the end of the second wind - no more hanging out with the Beautiful People, no more bar hopping with the roomie I've lived with for five years, no more parties at the house thrown by me, even my time with T will be less next year if his girl has anything to say about it.
In my sickly state, I spent some quality time with the couch and cable this afternoon. There were a plethora of Lowe's commercials on. So of course I started daydreaming about what I see myself living in and doing in the future. What all I plan on doing to the apartment. What all I'm looking forward to. They had all these commercials for new washers and dryers - next year I get a brand new washer and dryer. This is what I think about now. Heck, even the Change of Address form from the post office had ads in it for home improvement and such.
Speaking of that little form, I picked up my new box today. The place I am moving to doesn't do home post delivery. That's right, I live in the middle of nowhere. It's a box in the rural route for the township. But I have one now. I hold the little gold key. Everything is falling into place for the move. All I need now is the storage bin for the summer. The lease packet was supposed to come in the mail Tuesday or Wednesday for the bin. Still isn't here yet. Silly laid back people and thier post system. Takes forever to get anything anywhere up here.
All that's left now is the flight downstate for Mother's Day and then the big packing when I get back. Everything is cleared out and de-cluttered. I still can't quite believe that I am moving to a new place yet won't be at camp this year. I mean hell, I don't own real summer clothes! Only camp staff T-shirts and raggedy boxer shorts and bluejeans. How do I justify the bandanas and 12 swimsuits now? Or the camp shirt I've had for 8 years?
And now the drugs are kicking in. NyQuil makes me ramble, so I will stop.
currently reading: The Rowan - Anne McCaffery
currently listening: 90s Indie station of Netscape Radio
