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24 Hours
27 May 2004 @ 1:49 p.m.
My surprise yesterday morning led to hugs, kisses, packing, movies, dinner, more packing, and plenty of talking. Just being in his arms again lifted the grayness from my shoulders. As he ran errands with me he mentioned how much better he feels just being in my presence, and I smiled.
Discussion was heavy most of the evening covering the immense topic of the future, our future to be exact. It started with talking about the dog Chewba wants to get � a Samoyed. We spent time reading pages of information about dogs � choosing a breeder, training, health issues, personality traits, and cost. Everything leads to these beautiful, strong, ancient work dogs. He mentions that he wants me there to pick out the dog, to visit the breeders, to bring it home, to just be there.
My job may prevent me from this request and the discussion continues. What will happen come the end of August? Will I have a job? Where will I live? I ensure him that I am not afraid, that I will do anything I can to live nearby. Another hug, another kiss.
He asks my preference of where we live. We. I say it isn�t my choice � the choice must be made based on the job he gets. He insists, I say Chicago. He smiles and says he wants the Chicago job too.
The word �wife� passes his lips and I dismiss it. This was the first time I�d heard him utter anything of a future farther than this coming September and it frightened me, though I have no idea why at the moment.
We continue to talk, though of lighter things. The name of the dog comes up once again. He thinks Poe is a great name, I agree. A big white and cream fluffy Poe. Then he�s silent just watching me. So much is left unsaid, yet so much was finally said aloud.
Now I sit, filing away the last papers from my desk. The apartment is sorted into an array of boxes � everything packed except the dishes and clothing. Chewba is on his way to pick up a friend�s truck so we can move everything to the storage bin tonight and tomorrow morning. I�m glad that he was here for the end, as he was here for the beginning. He moved the armoire in. He is moving it out.
currently reading: -
currently listening: Stellastarr � My Coco
