* Now
* Archives
* Disclaimer
* Bio
* Cast
* AIM
*
Guestbook
* E-mail
* Notes
* Survey
* Profile
* Reviews
* Quizzes
* Rings
* Reads
* Fanclub
* Clix Me!
All Content and Code �2000-2006 by Red
Hosted by DiaryLand.
Now
02 June 2003 @ 10:44 p.m.
10 hours until the big interview. Big meaning the best lead I have so far for a job, even though it is just bartending for a touristy hotel. Second interview just for low-wage, part-time work. We must love it when the market is in favor of the employers.
This is my third entry today. I hardly ever write this much anymore, but I am overwhelmed today. Overwhemled by feelings expressed here. Dealing with the father treating me as if I were a lazy 14 year old. Realizing I talk more to my dog than humans these days. Frustrations with not having the energy to make it out to the gym.
Then there was the contact from J. He wants to talk. He wants to know why I'm not out in Minnesota or back at my house. Apparently, I scared him with the letter and it took him a month to find me. This was mid-afternoon, so I pulled some crap about me being busy and that he should call me tonight to talk.
He didn't call back. Though the Father was using the phone most of the evening, so who knows.
I was so incredibly spoiled living on my own, having my own phone line, listening to my own music, eating my own food for the past five years. Moving back here has been difficult. I can't even pace next to the phone fretting about what I'm supposed to tell the person that deep down I still want as my best friend. That is if he calls. Which he didn't.
That phone call was too much for me to handle today. I seriously became sick to my stomach and hardly did anything all afternoon. What am I supposed to do? I told him not to contact me unless he truly wanted to salvage our relationship. And he contacts me.
Now what?
As always, if you like what you read, or are just feeling generous, please click on the Clix link. Thanks.
currently reading: Lyon's Pride - Anne McCaffrey
currently listening: Best of Ani Mix CD
